Hayden – Think about all the DHVs in …
Comment posted Low Self-Approval or Low Self-Esteem? by Captain Jack.
Hayden –
Think about all the DHVs in terms of Approval. Here’s an easy one: How would being Pre-Selected by Women affect the females who view it in terms of your approval of The Feminine in general?
Anonymous -cp -
About giving behavioral examples… The idea is when you stop disapproving of yourself first, then give YOURSELF approval the Linearity Principle of the Mind takes over and begins approving of others automatically. This will come through in your behaviors in ways that are 100% congruent for you. Therefore they won’t come across as approval seeking or kissing anyone’s ass. Master the exercise by constantly stopping the disapproval of yourself and giving yourself approval every moment. Be diligent. You will begin to feel so high you’ll wonder if someone spiked your Gatorade with Morphine.
Brett – Does anyone want to read Brett’s comment, re-read the post and comment on what is happening with Brett?
The Anonymous Right Above This Comment – Hey, thanks for reading… Did you do the exercise?
~ CJ ~
Captain Jack also commented
- [...] Your page is on StumbleUpon [...]
- [...] One of the reason both men and women don’t stick it out more stems from what I call Low Self-Approval: http://www.betheseducer.com/2008/05/low-self-approval-or-low-self-esteem/ [...]
- i miss you! did you get a girlfriend? whats the deal?
- Good Post… the key is self evaluation, and then taking care of what you find.
- Beautiful post!!
What was Buddha talking about?
State of consiousness = Being OR Mind
or
State of consiousness = Complete Awareness OR { ego + senses }
you can get past the Mind ( No Mind state ) by meditating deeply.
so when Mind = 0
state of consiousness = Being
This is what Buddha was referring to.
what constitutes the Mind then?
Mind = thinking about worldly things
in other words Junk = { Game, women, labels, ego etc } which the senses love
as long as Mind = Junk, you are a slave to your senses
You suffer, Cause the senses are never satisfied.
when you drop EVERYTHING, Conquer your senses, state of consiousness = Being
This is the ultimate GAME
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Awesome post, CJ!! I think this hit dead-on with a lot of thoughts concerning Inner Game, I know it definitely did for me..approval comes from within US, of course!! It all makes sense now, and it was SO simple! Thanks CJ!!! An addendum if I may: so do you think this means we can also “eliminate” the term “confidence” to a point as well, and replace it with “a lack of approval seeking”??
Operation Chaos (etc) –
Probably not. It would be best to use an entirely new word or phrase and include any “lacks” or other identifying characteristics in the definition.
This concept, once explained and understood by the listener, can then be invoked by the new word (or phrase) to increase communication efficiency.
~ CJ ~
Previous post on DHV’s:
“That’s the problem with not understanding root causes. Since the root cause isn’t really known a solution based on the faulty cause can at best be a PARTIAL solution. With each PARTIAL solution you SEEM to be getting closer to MASTERY…”
How is the lack of approval of the feminine a root cause that nulifies the other 5 DHV’s (as per Mystery)?
BTW, two great posts. 5 Stars.
Thank you. Awesome article.
Awesome, good point!
this post is brilliant. easily the best post in the history of this blog.
I approve of this post. You’re awesome.
Actually it would be great if you deconstruct approval giving behavior with good examples. For example when I said ‘you’re awesome’ in the last comment..I don’t think it is ‘approval giving’….sounds more rapport seeking. I think in the first few minutes of interactions a guy can quickly become ‘approval giving’…maybe there are specific routines that can be constructed around this. I have also seen couple of guys in boston lair who have a very approval giving face and body language and its very powerful.
– cp
I dunno how I feel about this post CJ. I feel like the thoughts were disorganized, under-developed, and even a little trite/cliche-ish. If I were a high-school english teacher, this paper would get a C-. Sorry man. Be careful about getting too lost in philosophy, it’s easy to lose focus.
Just my two cents, you don’t have to publish this comment if you don’t want to.
Brett
Captain Jack… the next inner-game master?
Thanks for the insight, I never thought about this…
Hayden –
Think about all the DHVs in terms of Approval. Here’s an easy one: How would being Pre-Selected by Women affect the females who view it in terms of your approval of The Feminine in general?
Anonymous -cp -
About giving behavioral examples… The idea is when you stop disapproving of yourself first, then give YOURSELF approval the Linearity Principle of the Mind takes over and begins approving of others automatically. This will come through in your behaviors in ways that are 100% congruent for you. Therefore they won’t come across as approval seeking or kissing anyone’s ass. Master the exercise by constantly stopping the disapproval of yourself and giving yourself approval every moment. Be diligent. You will begin to feel so high you’ll wonder if someone spiked your Gatorade with Morphine.
Brett – Does anyone want to read Brett’s comment, re-read the post and comment on what is happening with Brett?
The Anonymous Right Above This Comment – Hey, thanks for reading… Did you do the exercise?
~ CJ ~
This is by far the best game related post I have read in a long time.
Much respect, CJ!
If there is any need for another ebook within this knowledge inundated community, then it’s a dictionary correcting most of the vocabulary out there.
Satori
Brett – Does anyone want to read Brett’s comment, re-read the post and comment on what is happening with Brett?
If no one else does – please elaborate. I’m interested to hear what you’re going to say.
Yes CJ, right after I read this post I was on my way to bed and before I fell asleep I thought about this post and thought of the times where I felt like I was the SHIT and I kept those feelings inside of me until I went to sleep. Then, when I woke up I tried to remember them again in the shower and I did. It was interesting to me because my normal work day I interact with people all the time, and they are my clients and they are usually of “higher value” than I. But, that day was particular interesting because of the way they treated me, they treated me different. In a good way, of course. They were asking me “What do you think of this?” a woman I delivered to even offered me Bacon and Coffee!
But, the article hit me really deep when you said most people go through their whole lives disapproving of themselves and to “remedy” that disapproval people seek approval from others.
You truly found an awesome way to remedy it the correct way.
Also, I love how you use Buddhist principles. They are so simple, yet so complex. And there is always deep meaning in every saying but then again it is also simple. I took a meditation class with my Muay Thai training (Trainer taught both) and it really helped me even in fighting and just confidence, so I recommend that to everyone and relate it very well (in reference to the article).
Thanks!
Great post. Reminded me of the Churchill quote below, but then taking it to the next level regarding how to apply it
“People seem not to see that their opinion of the world is also a confession of character” – Winston Churchill
This is the deal… I want to know how you make it as a seduction instructor….
I got separated and divorced…since then I started studing the dating science up to the point I think I cannot learn any more…. I have never take a boot camp or something like that but I’ve been getting in the internet , buying cd’s, etc. I’m been laying 7’s and 8’s constantly, I have right now 5 fuck-buddy, I had my first threesome…. I’m not comparing with you but I’ve improve 150% about I was doing before even though I’m a comercial diver so I have to spend time offshore… I’m not even from here…I’m Colombian but all my pick ups aren’t latin women… I’m living in Houston, so I was wondering: what the fukc… happen…. there are so many women here, good night life and everything… but the community here is weak, you live close by, that’s why I’m writing you… you should come and check it out by yourself, my place is avalaible and anyways I’d like to measure myself with a pro… anyway, I think I have the “right stuff” to make it as an instructor… let me know dude.
Dirk Pitt
Do you have any tips or suggestions on getting rid of approval-seeking behavior and especially thinking?
I try to stop myself from doing an action if I realize its just for the approval. But my endless insecurities and such thoughts are still there, with me still wanting approval so badly every moment of the day no matter how hard I fight it off.
Then again, I’m 22, so I suppose I have years to fight this all off.
Great post.
Argh! I keep visiting but where has the awesome CJ been! No updates for a while =( , hope all is well big man!
~free_spirit~
Seriously, put up an update. You’re the only blog that’s not full of shit, seriously please put up something new.
Beautiful post!!
What was Buddha talking about?
State of consiousness = Being OR Mind
or
State of consiousness = Complete Awareness OR { ego + senses }
you can get past the Mind ( No Mind state ) by meditating deeply.
so when Mind = 0
state of consiousness = Being
This is what Buddha was referring to.
what constitutes the Mind then?
Mind = thinking about worldly things
in other words Junk = { Game, women, labels, ego etc } which the senses love
as long as Mind = Junk, you are a slave to your senses
You suffer, Cause the senses are never satisfied.
when you drop EVERYTHING, Conquer your senses, state of consiousness = Being
This is the ultimate GAME
Good Post… the key is self evaluation, and then taking care of what you find.
i miss you! did you get a girlfriend? whats the deal?
this is awesome. This is what inner game is all about
this is awesome. This is what inner game is all about