Fuck Alcohol
This post is a waste of fucking time. Save yourself 3 minutes and don’t read it.
The night ended with me in the car with vomit on my brand new jacket ($27.98 at Target)… I was shivering from the cold and dizzy as hell.
The day started innocuous enough. I met Sinn at the bookstore to do some “work…” Sinn and I have similar working styles.
Type 2-3 sentences… take a 5 minute break. Another 2-3 sentences, bathroom break, etc. until about 8 hours later we have a full paragraph.
Then, we hit the fucking alcohol store because Sinn wanted to get alcohol for the “after party” that we’re always trying to get stupid girls to come to…
This is where it starts going south.
I decided to have a taste of the Chimay I bought but Sinn is so fucking poor and disorganized he has no cups. So there I am with a gigantic bottle of Chimay and it has one of those gay ass lids that once you pull it off it won’t go back on…
Decision time… Finish the bottle or let that delicious concoction created by Trapist Monks in Belgium go to waste.
Fuck it… can’t be wasting beer. There are poor people in the world who can’t afford Chimay.
And, what’s a 40 without rap music?
So, I log onto Youtube and search for all the true gangster rap. The chimay bottle is almost empty and I’m thirsty and already buzzed.
Eazy-e would have more beer…
Shiner 1 down.
Sinn is laughing at me because I’m drunk at 4:00 pm on a Tuesday, but whatever, he’s not drunk so his input doesn’t matter.
We stumble out to go have some mexican food with one of our friends and he says we should have more beer.
Miller Lite #1 and #2 go down over dinner while our friend tells us he’s awesome and some other non-coherent bullshit. I agree that he’s awesome because I don’t hang with unawesome people.
I spent most of the time whining about how I hate to approach girls and how they should just come fucking talk to me if they wanna unleash the beast in the sheets.
Sinn says he loves women. He loves everything about them… how they smell… how they can’t make a rational decision… He says all girls are his and he loves them whether they have sex with him or not, that he respects their decision and they’re valuable anyway… (Oh, wait a minute… no he didn’t).
After dinner our friend is still talking about how awesome he is and we go back to Sinn’s apartment.
I’m watching rap videos on Youtube while Sinn and awesome friend talk about how they want to be like me… how they wish they had been born with my intellect and wit… it’s making me blush and I pretend like I’m not listening. They’re making plans to get a massive manly physique like mine and shit but it’s really all genetics man, nothing you can do about that shit.
We finish off the Shiner and decide we’re going to have to leave the apartment if we want more beer.
Fucking inconvenient.
I stagger down the hallway. Someone mentions having more Chimay and that’s what we do when we get to the bar.
After 3 more chimays I open my phone and start talking shit to pretty much everyone in my phone. One of the fucking dumbasses I’m with says we should go drink somewhere else and we do…
About 1:15 am I black out after calling the bartender a lesbian.
I got about 15 messages this morning from girls that said, “Wtf? What’s that supposed to mean!?!”
Fuck Alcohol.
~ CJ ~
Force21 -
Crack the Back of Your Most Persistent Sticking Points, Go to A Level Never Seen Before...
I have created a program to help you crack the back of your most persistent sticking points. It is called Force*21 and it has the potential to spring you to the next level in a mere 21 days.
Force*21 Is not a bunch of theory. It is not a bunch of rehashed techniques. It is the application of my newest technology to YOUR Game with me as a guide.
It will crack the back of your most persistent sticking points and spring you to the next level.
I want you to have my new technology.
I want you to get to this level, too.
>>> Click Here to Learn More About Captain Jack's FORCE21 Program <<<
See Related Posts
- Force*21 [17.33]
- The First Online Day2 [13.1369]
- Funusuals!!! [12.6079]
- Lay Report: The Acrobatic Monkey [11.1052]
- Creation of Pick-up Ability Part 2 [10.9699]
If you enjoyed this post, please consider to leave a comment or subscribe to the feed and get future articles delivered to your feed reader.
CJ… You just didn’t compare a good Belgium beer to a shitty 40 of what you call beer in the States!
To all Belgians who are proud of their beers ( Yes, we have OVER 400 kinds of beer), I think you owe us an apology!
And Chimay with Rap? Even worse! Classic Rock would go much better.
Cheers
Hey man, today is the day of apologies… I think I’ve apologized to nearly a dozen people so far for being a drunk idiot yesterday… so might as well add all Belgians as well…
I apologize for comparing your great belgium beer to our shitty beer…
The music really just depends on my mood… could’ve just as easily been Yanni.
~ CJ ~
Hahaha.
Don’t get me wrong, just beer that comes in the size of a 40 is bad. I’m personally fond of MGD and Coors Light.
Also, if given the chance to have other Belgium Beer, I would recommend Duvel, and a true Trapist Triple.
Have a good one CJ
ROFL. Freaking awesome.
With out great pain; come no great learnings the Chinese have a saying “you must learn to eat bitter”
Your subconscious must be trying to tell you something, I don’t know when you’ll realize it. It could be now; it could be a month from now, but when you do, great things are ahead.
-R
haha Nice.. I’ve been there myself, Don’t worry the shame will pass
lmfao
That creative prose is hilarious. No wonder you’re so successful with the ladies.
~ Synth
The code on this page is setting off my anti-virus!!
Vince,
And, now I have all your private info… muaahaahahaha…
Just kidding. I have a lot of tracking code to see what posts people read the most, how long they stay on the site, etc… it’s all in mass aggregated data so there’s ZERO chance of any personal info but that’s probably what the AV software is worried about.
~ CJ ~
I don't think I've ever laughed so hard while reading something.
I don't think I've ever laughed so hard while reading something.